I hate this chair with all my being. I can feel my soul growing darker with each day’s passing.My mind rages on. Why did life have to be so cruel? Why can’t I find the happiness that others seem to have? Why do I have to be stuck in this permanent hell? “Why does God hate me?” I say out loud.As I struggle to move my legs from the warmth of my bed, I swing them in unison over the edge. Using my cane, I pull on the wheelchair’s arm to bring my jailer closer to me.I hate everything about it. The shiny mocking chrome of its frame. The blue of the seat and arm rests. The blackness of the rubber tires. The squeak of my body being plunked down into my cage, my jail.I think to myself how people either treat me as someone to be ignored or someone who can just ‘figure it out for myself’. However, the ones that give me the horrified look when I do open my mouth and must ask for help really set my brain to raging.After all, I didn’t ask for the body to betray me and be so fragile. If I had a. Me: Can I ask you something?Graham: Shoot!Me: How does Olivia feel about being naked around you? Does that not feel at all weird for either of you?Graham: It all comes down to trust you know. I wanted her to feel comfortable with her body and I guess, comfortable with mine.Me: Right!Graham: There were times at home. Especially when she was getting older and her body started to develop, that I would notice the changes.Me: Ahaa!Graham: And there were some uncomfortable moments when she’d walk around the apartment in her underwear or I would accidentally walk in on her in the bathroom. Then one day, she came to my bedroom in the middle of the night. I had a nightmare and asked if she could sleep in bed with me.Graham: I wasn’t wearing any clothes under the sheets and before I could stop her, she was in bed with me. But rather than freaking out at seeing her father with no clothes on, she became curious as to why I was, you know, really hard.Me: Damn, that’s one hell of a story. What.
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